Four types of communication
Although you might find it hard at times, being assertive comes off as a positive attitude to the people around you. Especially when negative emotions take over. This can take time and skill to develop.
Being assertive means standing up for yourself appropriately while being honest and respectful to other people’s feelings. Asking for help when needed will lead to better outcomes for all people involved helping to develop trust and equality in your relationships and families.
Reasons people struggle to be assertive may include: Low self esteem, not knowing how you present yourself, fear, embarrassment, emotions, wanting to be liked, anger.
The four common types of communication are:
1) Assertive- Expressing your own opinions calmly, truthfully, diplomatic, directly, non-apologetic, confidant, considerately, while willing to listen to others with good eye contact.
2) Passive- sensitively, shy, quiet, introverted, apologetic, poor eye contact, poor posture, indirect discussions, does not stand up for themselves, accepts defeat easily.
3) Aggressive - Angry, inconsiderate, loud, sarcastic, tense, judgemental, defensive, attacks others, loses temper.
4) passive aggressive- Bitter, hostile, ignorant, pessimistic, feeling hard done by.
Every right I claim I extend to others
Treat others how you wish to be treated. I am assertive when I- treat people with respect, hold logical view points and have them heard, take my own feelings seriously, have priorities, make mistakes, change my mind, choose which personal questions I answer, choose when and if to assert myself, define boundaries, get what I pay for, refuse when needed, ask for what I want, to not accept being patronised.
7 Quick tips
1) Practice what you want to say.
2) Hold eye contact.
3) You have the right to your own feelings.
4) Politely say you’re not finished when interrupted.
5) When saying ‘NO’ explain why.
6) Ask questions to clarify you’re listening
7) Use humour
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